It's cold today. The air is white with damp, cold fog. The ground is wet with melting snow, and the grass that is visible is brown and dead. The atmosphere is drab and the feeling disconcerting. Those who have not grown up with the sun, the sand, and the waves available in California don't understand their influence on my very existence, and the dramatic difference it makes in my mood and happiness.
I'm considering CalPoly San Luis Obispo again for school. I have another year and a half of general education requirements before I can transfer, but since I dislike Idaho so much and still love the idea of San Luis Obispo so much, I think the money would be worth it to me. Perhaps I could even stay home in California and go to junior college there starting in the fall. Perhaps I could go to junior college in San Luis after all, as I had planned before.
Whatever it is that I decide, I know that I like school, and I even like this particular college and atmosphere, but the weather and boring life of this state is pushing me away. I've decided I hate the cold; I hate the snow, and I hate winter. I am a California girl through and through, and I'm ready to go home.
The problem is finances. I don't know where I will live in California. I don't know how I'll pay rent or how I'll find a place to live. Idaho really is the ideal place for the middle-class student. But to me, it feels worth it to go into a little bit of debt to feel happier, more settled, and home.