Thursday, May 15, 2008

I'm Beginning to Wonder...

I'm beginning to wonder if... this Creative Writing class just isn't for me. Maybe it isn't so much the teacher; maybe it is just me. I'm not really sure. I've always considered myself a good writer, but when I sit in that class, I just feel out of my element.

First of all, as I've said before, I feel as though everything I write isn't good enough, is completely uninteresting, or is just plain not what the teacher likes. Am I the only one that faces this woe? It certainly seems so. Secondly, today is a good example of why I don't feel like this is my type of writing --

"Let's do a practice exercise. Write 1 paragraph about the physical characteristics of a character you have been working on for a while."

I blankly sit and stare at my paper. A character I've been working on for a while? Right... I finally wrote something down, but it was basically just the dark version of how I view myself.

"Next, write down your character's mental, spiritual, emotional traits."

Now I am just making things up. I go off of how my dark character looks and make up random words that seem to match her hair color.

"What are a few mistakes your character needs to make in order for your story to work?"

Story? What story? Have I been thinking of a story for all of these years also? Whatever. Definitely not me, but the character makes the mistake of crashing her car because she drives home drunk.

Wow. Really, I felt like the weirdo in that class. We broke up into groups and talked about our "well-thought" characters, and this girl starts talking about how she has had this character, and written about this character since she was 14. The character's physical appearance is well-developed, and she knows her inside and out. She is a medieval character, masculine... not quite gorgeous but beautiful in her own way....

Right. And my story is just a grown up version of what I wrote about in 5th grade.

Honestly, I love reading. I also love writing. Just not this type of writing. Maybe fictional stories just aren't my forte and I have to wait until we get into creative non-fiction. I'm not sure. All I know is that it makes no sense to me that, while I can write any academic essay and impress a crowd, I don't even enjoy making up things that can't possibly be true. Not that I don't enjoy them; as I said, I love to read. The Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, and Twilight are all exceptional books in my opinion -- yet completely, utterly ridiculous from a real-world standpoint. Personally, I like making satire of the reality of everyday life.

Anyway, it's obviously far, far too late to drop this class; and even if I could, if English does continue to be my major, I'll have to stick it through sometime. But what if I do end up changing my major, again? Eh, oh well. I guess it isn't a complete waste of time.


not2brightGRAM said...

Stick with it.

That's the purpose of college.



(similar to life.)

Rebecca said...

One of the good things about getting a degree from a liberal arts college is that you are forced to take a wide variety of classes. Sometimes you sign up for something thinking you'll love it, only to find out you hate it (like this class). Other times, you sign up for a required class, dreading it, only to discover that you actually really enjoy it. Either way, you've learned something. . . about the subject matter and about yourself. =)

I took a creative writing class that I loved, but if my professor had given us an exercise like that, I wouldn't have known what to write. I think you would be enjoying the class if you were able to sit under the professor who taught my class. All of his exercises were great and he was really unbiased.